Amor Fati is translated as (love of fate).
Not only accepting but loving everything that happens in my life. It’s a pretty radical mindset that has its origins in Stoic philosophy and was coined by Friedrich Nietzsche.
Amor Fati is a mindset I am adopting for own life and I believe it is a good start to living a more meaningful life. If we can love everything that happens to us there is no room for excuses and instead we can get to work on living the best life we can manage and putting in the work that is going to make us happier.
I also believe that the Amor Fati mindset is a good starting point for positive self talk and being more resilient. When we love everything that happens to us the origin of our positive self talk feels less contaminated by the “Eyeore” syndrome. Sense we know that the stories we tell ourselves make us either optimistic or pessimistic, changing our stories can change us.
Adopting an Amor Fati mindset like most worthwhile things in life will take work and daily practice but I am excited about putting the mindset into practice and sharing the mindset with others.
What are typical career goals? Make money, get promoted, save for retirement, etc…
If these are typical career goals, what are atypical career goals?
The answer to this question could be very long and still not necessarily be exhaustive. But here are few atypical career goals I am thinking about.
- Make meaning matter more than money.
- Changes lives, change your community and change world for the better.
- Be creative in whatever your career field you have chosen.
- Build things that matter, make a difference and change lives.
- Cultivate quality relationships with your colleagues, customers, clients, etc…
- Be a good team player, whatever role you serve in.
- Serve others.
We all present different versions of ourselves to the world, to others, and to ourselves. We all wear masks and act out various roles in lives.
So, who are you?
I think its safe to say we are the personas we display each day and this is not a negative thing but in reality a useful way to navigate the world. One of the keys I think is understanding what persona or mask is appropriate and how our various masks are perceived by others, in short, how do others see us.
I know a common message heard today is that “we/I don’t need others”, “I can make it, do it on my own”, “I can thrive on my own.” Really? Aren’t there always others involved in some way in the successes and failures of our lives? If so, then being aware of how our personas impact others is a key to understanding our relationships with others.
I am not saying we should be acting like someone else and not being ourselves, whatever that means, instead, I think we should closely monitor our interactions with others, good, bad or ugly. In this way we can hopefully begin to see patterns in our relationships that are likely impacted by the personas we present in given situations.
Wearing masks does not always have to be disguises we hide behind instead our masks can help us present the best/most appropriate versions of ourselves to others, embrace your masks, it’s who you are.
Image above retrieved from here: https://goo.gl/images/7iDG5Z
Points of view inform our opinions, thinking and decision-making. We all have different points of view related to the many facets of our lives. I am particularly interested in points of view and mental models that “assume positive intent”, something author Daniel Pink talked about on the Tim Ferriss podcast. This point of view is similar to the ideas that people are generally good and do not wish harm and that often when things that we don’t like or are harmful happen it is better not to attribute malice to quickly when stupidity or a mistake might actually explain what happened (Hanlon’s Razor).
Okay, so I know on the surface this sounds like a “Pollyanna” points of view but I think that is a simple conclusion and one that could stand in the way of possibly changing our points of view as it relates to other people.
So, assuming positive intent and not attributing malice when ignorance or stupidity might be a better explanation is a way to relate to others with less hatred and paranoia. I think its safe to say in our world that less hatred and paranoia is always a bonus.
We live during a time when more information is accessible than any other time in human history. The pace in which this information is disseminated is faster than ever and our world moves equally as fast. I personally wonder about my pace, slow-ish in relation to the world around me, and I question whether or not I am missing out on something or if I should speed up to match the pace of information?
So I am coming to the conclusion that I don’t need to speed up, which isn’t likely to happen any way, instead I need to master ways to process and use the information I digest using an approach that suits my slow-ish pace.
My solution of sorts when it comes to reading as an example is to process better. I am a slow reader so I am not going to digestive a lot information in a given time period but what I can do is make the most of what I am reading.
My approach: I take notes in the margins of the books I am reading and I pay attention to what I am reading and learning. I am always looking to use the information in different ways, my goal is to synthesis and make the information personal. So I might write a blog a post and or create and present the information to others in a workshop or class. I seek out related content, this is a lot easier in the world we live in with google, amazon and algorithms. Ultimately, simply sharing what I have learned with others, I think this has something to do with brain plasticity and neurons and stuff, is a good way to process and hopefully I gain some useful feedback and that will spark more learning.
Okay, so slowing down the world is not going to happen to but slowly down me is a solution that is actionable and it feels like I am mastering a little part of the world in the process.
Image retrieved from here: https://goo.gl/images/XBQNwC
The advice I would give my 16 Year old, 21-year-old, 30-year-old, and my 40-year-old self.
There is a pattern here.
It’s simple, “try stuff dude!”
The bottom line, I am just like everyone else, I think, I often have made decisions in an effort to avoid fear and suffering, the dynamic duo. Of course, in the process I am not trying all the stuff I could be trying.
So my advice to myself to try stuff is about exposing myself to fearful situations and potential suffering.
Okay, so I am not going to stick my head in a lion’s mouth or take up high wire walking. My fear and suffering typically has been related to relationships, romantic and platonic, honestly, my biggest challenges in the past have been in this area of my life.
Try Stuff Dude! Fail along the way, learn somethings, try some more stuff. Realize that fear and suffering is going to come in some form and trying to avoid this dynamic duo is holding me back from experiencing life to the fullest extent.
Image retrieved from here: https://goo.gl/images/nUyrJh
KISS, is an actual principle developed by the U.S. Navy in 1960, which explains how I learned about the principle while serving in the Marine Corps for many years. It is a principle that is easy to remember and can be applied, not surprisingly, to many areas of our lives.
I am not sure where to go with this but I like the idea of a simple formula for complex problems and KISS is reminder to look for the simple solution.
I seem to remember on more than one occasion when KISS was used someone was tying to show how smart they were by adding more complexity, I think the opposite is often true.
If you are so smart then you should be able to keep it simple for us less smart folks.
Image retrieved from here: KISS